The Llanah Chronicles: Doubts
by Penmasterap
Summary: Llanah and Jaina share a stolen night in Theramore during the War for Northrend, but doubts begin to arise about their future.


In the pale light of a full moon Llanah stirred on the bed, letting out a sigh as she threw her arms over her head in her sleep. Face down in her pillow her indigo hair surrounded her like a dark halo, covering her face and neck, leaving only the tips of her long, elven ears visible. She rolled over on her back and sensed the empty space next to her before she even opened her eyes.

Gathering the cream colored silk around her bare chest like a robe she sat up, and saw her lover standing by the tower window. The white moonlight shone in the narrow opening and turned the woman's hair golden. Llanah smiled, one corner of her mouth curling up and her eyes softening with affection as she rose out of the bed, silently, and made her way across the circular room. The hunter paused only to give a quick pat to the wolf and large cat that slept together near the staircase in the centre.

At the window Lady Jaina Proudmoore gazed across the expanse of water beyond Theramore harbor, her light eyes heavy with thought. She had pulled her robe around her to stave off the cold of the night but it had loosened and was now a drape at best; Llanah came upon her without words and left a light kiss where it fell off her shoulder, wrapping her arms around the smaller woman's waist.  
"You should sleep." Jaina said, placing her hands over the elf's, "it's late and you must be tired." She added, with a impish smile, remembering their reunion earlier that night. One of the unsung causalities of war was time apart from the ones you loved. The Night Elf hated how the battle for Northrend kept her and Jaina apart, when they were in the same kingdom; when they were in the same room. There was no room for affection on the battlefield, and her Lady had duties to attend to that involved more diplomatic errands than the hunter was cut out for.

"Come back to bed." Llanah replied as she let her chin rest on the Jaina's shoulder, "you look cold."  
"A mage is never cold, darling." She lifted her hand from where it lay and a small ball of flame appeared, making orange light flicker on the women's faces. Jaina casually pointed at the dark hearth and the fire relit itself instantly; the warmth was immediate. Llanah laughed.  
"My scholar." She breathed into Jaina's neck, "you never cease to amaze me." She smiled, "except for that time you set the sheets on fire." She added as she kissed her way up to the mage's ear. Jaina tilted her head back, unable to help it with Llanah's lips on her throat, but scoffed as she did so.  
"That was not my fault. I cannot be blamed for what I do when you –" she shivered as Llanah's hands slid up under her robe and found her breasts, "...when I lose control." She moaned and leaned her weight back onto Llanah, arching her neck.

"Come back to bed," she repeated, "and see if I can't make you freeze them this time." The elf said, softly, running one finger along Jaina's collarbone. She smelled of deep, arcane things; sandalwood, mageroyal and goldthorn, and the hunter breathed it in, feeling her desire rising.  
"In a moment, my vixen" Jaina replied, turning and laying a light kiss on the elf's lips and wrapping her robe tightly around her. "My mind is far away right now and I don't want it to be anywhere but with you when I set _you_ on fire." She said with a smirk.

Llanah raised her eyebrows and sat at the end of the bed, staring at her lover's small frame. She had seen the determined look on Jaina's face before and knew from her tone that no amount of teasing would change the mage's mind until she was good and ready. "What occupies your thoughts, _fulo_" she asked, wrapping her hands in her golden wolf, Farley's, fur. She massaged the sleeping wolf as she let Jaina gather her thoughts. After so many years she had learned that sometimes when the issue was dear to her heart the woman needed time to sort things out before she spoke – a trait that many of Jaina's fans and foes alike would never believe the outspoken mage capable of. Jaina sighed and turned, her silken hair draped down over one shoulder, hiding her face from Llanah as she looked again over the harbour.

"I was watching you sleep." She finally spoke, "you seemed so peaceful it nearly broke my heart in two, knowing you trusted your happiness in me. All your strains of battle were worn away." She let out a sigh, "but I couldn't sleep like you did." She turned back to her lover, her blue eyes sorrowful, "everyone who has ever cared for me has fallen to shadow and darkness. Arthas, Kael', my father… I cannot watch you undergo the same fate." Jaina dropped her head quickly, hiding her tears from Llanah.

The hunter got to her feet and went to Jaina in one lithe movement, "_Ande'thoras-ethil_, dear one. Do not fret. It was not you who chose their fate." Her eyebrows knit together as she tilted Jaina's face to hers and held it in her hand, "and know this. I do not sleep as sound without you near me, my beloved. I sleep fitfully." She kissed the human and smiled, trying to lighten the mood. "I hit Wyn in the face once when we shared a tent." Llanah pulled the robe around Jaina tighter and went on, "my love for you knows nothing of fear, or hopelessness, or shadow. Nothing. My _dalah'ronae-terro_, you are my always, _dalah'fulo_."  
Jaina let out a shuddering breath but said nothing for a time; her lips pressed together, her eyes searching Llanah's for some kernel of doubt.

"I cannot trust that. How are you certain? What if it is me?"

"The Goddess brought me to you in your darkest hour, and you to me when I did not know I needed it. Trust in that," Llanah replied.

Jaina nodded, curtly, but said nothing as she walked over to the pitcher of water that lay on the table. She poured a glass and took a drink before joining Llanah on the end of the bed, leaning into the taller woman.  
"This burden is heavy on my heart. It feels as though this is my battle; all of Northrend's fate lies on my shoulders because of what Arthas has become. All I ever wanted was to study and now I lead a kingdom to war." She turned herself on the bed to face her lover, "Varian's judgment is clouded by vengeance; Thrall's people are torn in two… and I all I can think of is how all of this could have been avoided. Maybe if he had never met me…"

Llanah stroked the sorceresses hairline lightly, "there is nothing but good in you, Jaina. You are a strong leader of your people with a pure heart," she tucked Jaina's hair behind her ear. "Do not carry the weight of others for no reason." The women's lips met, briefly, before they rested their foreheads against each others. After a moment Llanah spoke again, "those who you speak of were not like you. Kael' was always a spoiled princeling, destined for the unfortunate path he took, and Arthas, well, Arthas…" she trailed off, not quite sure if she was ready to continue.

"I know good men, Jaina, Arthas was not a good man. A noble one, perhaps, but not just, nor kind." Jaina stiffened against her and turned her head,

"you speak as though you knew him." She said, coldly, making Llanah's heart sink. She licked her lips, nervously, as Jaina stood abruptly and stared out the window again, arms crossed over her chest. She watched a boat dock at the port as tension filled the room. Farley looked up from the bed, his canine instincts immediately telling him something was amiss with his mistress. He whined, quietly, and Llanah hushed him before breaking the silence.

"It's him isn't it? Your mind isn't on the battle for Icecrown, but its occupant." She didn't give Jaina a chance to reply as the mage turned from the window, her face an image of shock. "And I speak of him because I do know him, or at least his character, Jaina." She let out a long stream of air from her nose, trying to calm her emotions. "There are things I have never told you; I didn't know how to confess them. I do not know if you will look at me the same once I do."

She took a deep breath, weighing the words on her tongue before saying them. "You worry about me falling to darkness? I have been there, mage, and it was your _precious_ Arthas's doing." She knew these things would sting Jaina but at the moment she didn't care.

"Al'lan'ah-" Jaina began, using the elf's full name, but Llanah held up her hand, effectively cutting her off.

"Let me finish, please." She said, her voice softer, her anger ebbing. "I need to finish this or I will never speak of it again." She sighed, letting out a long breath, "Jaina, there is a place called the Caverns of Time, an eerie expanse of sand hiding portals to times long past." Jaina gasped, but nodded, speech robbed from her for a moment.

"I thought it merely legend," she finally replied.

"No, I assure you, it is very real." Llanah continued, clasping her hands in her lap, staring past the mage and out the window. "We were approached one night with a task, by the Keepers of Time, an errand we could not refuse as the timeline of our world depended upon its completion." She ran her tongue along her teeth, "I didn't know why they picked us then, but I have my theories now. Never the less, we were to attend the culling that took place in Stratholme and assure it occurred exactly as it did when it happened." Llanah paused, looking up at her lover, "I was there with you, Jaina, I watched him destroy that city. I helped."

"How?" Jaina inhaled roughly, "I would have known. I..." she trailed off, unable to continue, taking the information in. She crossed the room, "I would have seen you."

"I saw _you_." Llanah said, pointedly, "You seemed so happy, despite all the goings on in Azeroth, but I was not. I know you know how hard it is to see the one you love and be unable to reach them... Knowing what was coming I needed the comfort of your arms, Jaina, but I was forbade from reaching out to you. You wouldn't have wanted me to anyway, you had him then."

The hunter gazed out at the moon and smiled sadly; it was not a pleasant memory but she remembered something else. "I was so proud of you when you refused to be there, you were so young and yet you held steadfast to your morals." She looked Jaina right in the eyes, "you know, I don't think I have ever loved you more than in those moments. Funny enough, as I had yet to have met you, technically." She shook her head, clearing her thoughts. Jaina stared.

She exhaled heavily, "but Jaina, I will never forget the coldness in that man's eyes. The calmness as he slaughtered innocent citizens _of his own kingdom_. It was not mercy, it was madness," the hunter stood, pacing, her muscles straining with anxious energy. "And he was at ease." She spat out, infuriated, "children begged for their lives and he ignored their pleas; gutted them. We helped. Dori refused to do it at first, Bereyn had to carry her under his arm for fear she would be stuck there forever unless she followed us. Even Lyrandria wept, Wyntersong was silent for days..."

Jaina let out a sceptical laugh, "thats a feat for Wyntersong," she murmured. It was no secret that there was no love lost between the two women.

Llanah tilted her head, disapprovingly, and continued. "Bereyn wielded his sword with his eyes closed." She sat down on the windowsill with one leg on the ledge. "I collapsed behind a barrel, covered in blood, and everything I had eaten came up between my knees." Tears silently rolled down the elf's cheeks, but she looked directly into Jaina's eyes. "I could not fathom it, but we were forced to do his bidding to preserve the fabric of our world… but you had a choice, you walked away. You were spared the memories of his actions. I was not. Arthas was not a good man, Jaina."

Jaina had folded her arms around herself during Llanah's confession and she remained silent, not sure what to say. "Llanah," she whispered, finally, "I don't know what to say. I do not know what I could possibly tell you to relieve you of the atrocities you've witnessed. My darling I am so very sorry, I had no idea..." Jaina trailed off, still stunned.

Llanah did not look at her; she couldn't bear to. Instead she swallowed hard and spoke softly, almost too low for her lover to hear, "just tell me if you can ever forgive me. But more importantly, tell me if you still love him..."

She heard Jaina gasp, "because I will kill him. I hope you realize that. Tyrion has us set to march on Icecrown Citadel in a fortnight, you know this. If you still love him I must know." She turned her head and looked Jaina in the eyes, "I will not destroy the keeper of my lover's heart, as much as it tears me apart to not do so. I will send someone in my stead. I watched him break your heart once, I wanted to slide my blade into his belly for it, but I will not do this if it will hurt you."

Jaina let her hands fall to her sides as what Llanah said sunk in. Her mouth was half open, and her brow furrowed as realization dawned on her. She slowly shook her head, massaging her temple and blinking before she finally spoke, "love him? How can you think that? I do not love him, my dearest elf."

She crossed the space between herself and Llanah and took the hunter's face in her hands. "I ceased to love him long ago. Arthas Menethil is no longer alive, I know that. It is his memory I care for, but I do not love that monster that wears his body and taints his voice. I could never keep loving a ghost."

Jaina wrapped her arms around the elf's neck and buried her face in Llanah's dark hair. Llanah wrapped her arms around Jaina's back, letting the relief wash over her like a welcome bath.

"I could never love him like I do you. I am not even certain I ever did, now that I know the bond we share. What he and I had pales." Jaina said into Llanah's neck, letting her hands slide down the elf's back.

"I guard my heart well, ever since what happened between Arthas and I, and I didn't think anyone could get near it again, and yet somehow you did." She let her eyes take in all of Llanah's face, surveying the features she loved so much. "I did not want you to suffer because of me, Llanah, and now I see I've done exactly that. I've hurt you. You've had these doubts all along, my wild one?" Llanah nodded, slighty, "then I am sorry."

Llanah let her tears ebb away as Jaina wiped them off her face. They kissed, letting it linger, before Llanah spoke again. "You've never said that to me before." Jaina smiled,

"but you must have known. I have shown you."

"I know only what my heart feels, not what lies in another's." The elf replied, but Jaina shook her head, giving the hunter a teasing smile and letting her hand rest on Llanah's hips, pulling her closer.

"Well come, let me show you again." She guided Llanah's face down to her own and let their lips meet in a long, hungry kiss. Llanah reacted immediately, straining against her lover, their bodies separated by the thinnest wall of fabric. "Let me prove to you what lies in this woman's heart."

Jaina's hands slowly crept up the elf's bare sides, moving onto her back as their kiss deepened. She let out a moan as Llanah's hand found her breasts again and caressed them through the robe. Llanah moved her mouth down her neck but Jaina ran her hands through the hunter's thick tresses, pulling her mouth back to her own, "kiss me." She said simply, as she let her robe drop to the floor and backed up to the bed, dragging Llanah along with her.

The mage let herself fall back onto the mattress, narrowly missing Farley as the wolf gave his mistress and the Lady a scathing look and curled back up on the floor, growly softly to himself at being disturbed. Llanah laughed as Jaina let her hand drag down her arm, wrapping it around the elf's wrist and pulling her on top.

Jaina rose up to meet Llanah in another heated kiss as her hand wandered below the elf's waist and cupped her heated flesh. Llanah's breath hitched and she groaned throatily, "oh Jaina." Was all she could manage as she shuddered with anticipation and returned her attention to her Lady's neck, covering it with ravenous kisses.

Jaina arched up into Llanah's body, her hands still gently teasing her lover but not truly escalating her touches yet. She buried her other hand in Llanah's dark hair and pulled her down closer; both women moaned as their bodies met fully and they kissed feverishly.

"By Elune." Llanah said, moving her hands under Jaina's hips and rolling to the side, switching places as she pulled the blonde on top of her. They broke their kiss and simply stared at each other, breathing heavily, faces inches apart, before Jaina sat back, straddling the elf. Llanah rested her hands on the sorceress's thighs, mindlessly running them up and down. Jaina let her hand run up the elf's ribs and over her chest, coming to a stop at the scar below Llanah's left collarbone. The jagged mark was a shocking white against her blueish skin and the human traced it, lovingly. "Jaina, I am sorry for–" the woman cut her off by leaning forward and placing her hands on the elf's breasts, teasing them lightly, and Llanah's body bucked up, unconsciously, lightheaded with desire.

She leaned over the hunter, her blonde hair falling in her face and Llanah's, as she placed impassionate kisses on her throat and collarbone, ignoring Llanah's whimpering. She grabbed one of Llanah's wrists in each hand and pinned them to the bed and left them there as she kissed her way down the hunter's chest, stomach and thighs. "Sshh, let me study something other than books for a time."

The End


End file.
